this is your life. . .

Kisswithe

Some time ago (but not all that long),  a young girl was lost when her parents 

took her on safari.   They searched and searched to no avail, and returned home broken-hearted, even though they got a refund on her return ticket.

A pride of lions found her, but luckily, having just eaten, they saved her for later.  She was so cranky, they were hesitant to dine on her, so they decided to adopt her instead.  She grew up to be strong as an elephant, as cunning as a cobra, and  as swift as a gazelle.

Kisswithe of the Jungle!

The jungle animals grew to love her because of her braveness and to fear her, because she had a terrible mouth on her!  

She became the guardian of them all, healing their wounds, stopping their fights, and protecting them from the dangers of MAN.

As she got older, she got crankier, because there wasn't much for a social life in the treetops.  Giraffes were too tall, elephants too clumsy, 

and although apes were considered swingers, they smelled bad and their idea of a good time was to pick fleas off each other.

She started hanging around with a bad crowd, lounging on branches and throwing banana peels on the jungle paths.

One day another safari came to town.  Kisswithe was on the alert.

She was prepared to do battle to protect her home, but one look at the chief hunter and she was mush!  He was tall, and strong and handsome.  He wore cute little shorts with lots of pockets.  Kiss didn't know what had hit her.  She started bathing so much that  her friends said she had lost her distinctive smell.  She twined jungle vines in her hair and  asked the hyenas to teach her how to laugh seductively.

One day, as Kiss was hanging around (literally), the hunter came sauntering through the bush, looking for game.  Since Kiss was game, she thought it was time to make his acquaintance.  He was gob-smacked!  To make a long story short, Kiss bagged the hunter and now lives in a neat little detached cottage in the suburbs.  She stopped swinging , but sometimes they still play "Great White Hunter and Jungle Goddess" just to liven things up.

And so this tale comes to an end . . . .

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**Midi: "Another One Bites the Dust"